Columbia Star

Anchors getting annoying




I’m a fan of the “Fox and Friends” morning news show, but the hosts are really starting to get on my nerves.

They keep spitting out books, and I’m just wondering how on earth they find the time or energy to write anything… much less best sellers?

The female host, our own Ainsley Earhart, a Spring Valley, USC, and WLTX grad, just put out her third book, all three of which came after giving birth to her first child. Granted, two of the three are children’s books, but that’s two more than most of us not named Seuss have written.

I could barely find the energy to twist open a Mountain Dew when my wife had our first child. Ainsley is popping out a kid, two children’s books, and her own personal memoir while she’s co-hosting the No. 1 morning show on cable TV.

I thought I was accomplishing something just staying awake after my first kid poked her little head into this world.

I can only hope Ainsley takes a break from making the rest of us look bad when if and when that second child comes.

As my cousin told me when the wife and I were expecting our second child, “The work doesn’t double; it increases exponentially.”

But the other co-hosts, Steve Doocy and Brian Kilmeade have multiple children, and that didn’t stop them from putting out about seven books between the two of them.

They must have very understanding spouses and even more understanding children because it takes a lot of time to write a book, much less seven. These folks are already putting in countless hours at the office for the morning show. Kilmeade has a radio show on top of everything. It makes me tired thinking about all of it.

My wife and three kids are extremely understanding, but I’m not sure I could come home from work everyday, skip all their games and activities, and plant a fly-by kiss on the wife’s cheek on the way into a quiet room to pound out my great American novel. I know Iwouldn’t be that understanding.

Of course, after the whole Matt Lauer debacle, writing books is certainly a much more productive and family-friendly extracurricular activity for morning television hosts than what Matt was up to.

Ironically, he’s got plenty of time to write books now, but I’m guessing the folks in charge at “NBC News” would rather not see Matt take to pen and paper. He’s caused them enough grief without their dirty laundry appearing on the shelves at Barnes and Noble.

Having said all that, I have actually written a novella, which is a fancy way of saying “short novel.” It only took me 20 years. That amounts to about six words a day—not exactly Fox News anchor worthy. But hey, I’ve been busy and sleepy…like any other normal human being raising children.

Maybe some day I’ll get my novella published, and they’ll invite me on “Fox and Friends” to promote it. I just hope Ainsley, Brian, and Steve are still around by then.

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