2012-06-08 / Commentary

God’s dating service

I’m just saying...
Julia Rogers Hook

Well, I guess now God is running a dating service.

An online dating service to boot.

I heard this commercial the other day that said “Find God’s match for you,” and was taken aback.

I made a mental note to pay attention the next time that commercial came on. I mean, if God has opened His own dating service, how do the rest of us know we found His holy match for ourselves?

This dating service is fairly new, and I’m pretty sure it wasn’t around when I married my husband.

The next time the commercial came on, I paid attention. It’s a Christian dating service, which makes sense as people tend to want to marry someone of the same or a similar faith as they have. I mean I can see mixing a Methodist with a Baptist or something comparable, but I’m guessing neither of those would work really well with or be a good match for an unwavering atheist.

Not that I’m judging, mind you. I am a strong believer in live and let live. I have my beliefs, and I try to practice my faith, but that certainly doesn’t mean that my way is the only way. To each his/her own, I say. As long as it doesn’t hurt anyone, especially animals, children, or the elderly... rock on.

I personally don’t think I’d enjoy one of those backwoods churches where you dance with snakes, and they think that if you’re a good enough person the snake won’t bite you.

I don’t trust the snakes’ judgment of good and bad. They are almost certainly in a bad mood anyway, since they were probably out peacefully sunning themselves on a rock or a log when somebody grabbed them and slung them in a bag that wasn’t opened till the Sunday service. I’m guessing they would bite anyone at that point. So one of those church members would not be a good match for me, and my kids would NEVER go that church.

But I’m very curious about this new dating service that has hired God to choose romantic matches.

I want to see the forms and questionnaire that you fill out. I asked my husband to do it with me. He wasn’t into it at all.

“Honey….I’ve been thinking,” I tell him one night over dinner.

He sits up perfectly straight, his fork stopped in mid-air on its way to his mouth.

My husband says those are the four scariest words out of my mouth.

“And what have you been thinking about?” He was being cagey and cautious.

“Well….you know that new dating service that is geared toward Christian single people?”

“Yes…why?”

“Well I thought to myself how much fun it would be if we both joined it separately and filled out the questionnaires and see what happened. We could see if we are God’s match for each other.”

“Pass the salt please.” He was trying to change the subject, but I persisted.

“But wouldn’t it be fun to just do it to see what happens?”

“And if the questionnaires don’t match us up….then what?”

“But I’m sure they will,” I said smiling.

“I have never gone on a dating service in my life, and I’m not about to start eight years into our marriage,” he said.

“Aren’t you just a little curious to see if we’re God’s match for each other?”

“Nope,” he answered happily munching his corn on the cob.

“Why not?” I’m nothing if not determined.

“Because I’m in love with you, you’re in love with me, and we’re both happier than we’ve ever been, right?”

“Well….yes…but I still think…”

“That dating service is not run by God. That dating service is run by people who are trying to make money. We are not giving them any of ours. And that’s that.”

I had to admit defeat.

“I love it when you’re forceful,” I say in my best breathy voice.

And with that, he gave me a big sloppy kiss and a warm convincing hug.

Right then, engulfed in his arms, I knew for sure that we were indeed the perfect match for each other.

I do believe God matches people up with each other. But I don’t think He needs a computer or a dating service to do it. Sometimes, timing is everything.

I’m just saying….

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