The Woman Whose Garbage I’m Responsible for likes to blame my defective Y chromosome when I do something she considers wrong, rude, or disgusting. Her implication is that women are far too advanced to resort to such primitive behavior. I’m sure most other men are subjected to similar sexual harassment, especially those who live with judgmental women.

Men discovered everything worthwhile in current human society. The wheel, fire, agriculture, and the remote control are all man–made inventions. In fact, the very design of civilization itself has Y chromosome residue all over it.

Yet, when women emerged from the comfort of home a few decades ago to take their proper position in the modern workplace, they immediately began to criticize the way things were being done and started ridiculing men for being so rudimentary. We were called Neanderthals, cavemen, and primitive life forms because our way of thinking is different from those folks who weren’t at the front of the line and didn’t get a Y chromosome before the supply ran out.

Now it seems men may get the last laugh. A recent study suggests that the Y is the most evolutionary and has advanced at much faster rates than any other chromosome. Whitehead Institute researchers conducted the first comprehensive comparison of chromosomes and have discovered that the human Y sports considerable differences in genetic sequences when compared to the chimpanzee’s Y. They were identical just a few thousand years ago.

The findings confirm that man’s Y is advancing at a much faster rate than any other chromosome combination. The results are being published in the

current issue of Nature.

I’m not sure if this is considered a member of the liberal news media or not. You’ll have to check with Sean Hannity to be sure.

Jennifer Hughes is the author of the paper. Hughes is a postdoctoral researcher at Whitehead, and I’m pretty sure she’s a woman. If a man was named Jennifer, his Y chromosome would probably be underdeveloped, if you know what I mean.

Hughes says the part of the Y that is really advancing is the section in charge of sperm production. This comes as no surprise to any female who has ever lived with a man but does imply that the evolutionary capabilities of future generations may be even more affected by man’s contribution.

One interesting side discussion to all this is the dilemma faced by right wing extremists. Most of those are on record as believing in the concept of a male dominated society. Many also doubt evolution. So now one of the things they don’t believe can verify one of the things they truly believe. Nice irony, Jennifer Hughes.

So next time your female counterpart starts in again about what a savage you are and how much more civilized women are, whip out your laminated copy of this article. It won’t help in the argument; in fact it will only make her madder.

But the diversion might temporarily confuse her, and you can escape to some bastion of advanced evolution like a golf course or bar and have a real civilized conversation with guys over a few beers, a man’s invention, by the way.