Joe Biden says it's our patriotic duty to pay more taxes. President Obama hates gas- guzzling cars. The Department of Homeland Security thinks those with politically incorrect bumper stickers may be good candidates for domestic terrorism. A person who thinks marriage should be between one man and one woman is called a bigot, and someone who dares to call illegal immigration illegal is deemed a racist. We're supposed to hate Sarah Palin and feel sorry for the terrorists locked up at Gitmo, and it seems it's impossible to get out of bed without causing some type of global warming.

The age of guilt has returned. A democrat president and congress, and their friends in the mainstream media have made sure of that. I'm not saying President Obama and his buddies Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi won't save the economy and the world or that former President Bush and his buddies didn't have their issues, but I just don't remember the barrage of guilt under a Republican administration that I'm getting daily from this Democrat one.

Joe Biden says we don't pay enough taxes, but researchers at The Tax Foundation say Americans worked from January 1 to April 13 just to pay their upcoming 2009 tax bill. The good news is that's eight days earlier than 2008. The bad news is that's still more in taxes than Americans will spend on food, clothing, and housing combined. Even the vice- president has to admit that's a whole lot of patriotism, but I guess it's not enough to avoid the guilt- trip.

Thanks to President Obama, my SUV is now public enemy number one…well, public enemy number two. It's right behind that Hummer with the NRA bumper sticker. My bumper is clean, but I guess my emissions are not. I can't afford a Prius, and I live too far away to bike to work. So I guess I'll be taking my SUV on a guilt trip…at least for the next four years.

Even if I got rid of my SUV to stop funding those nasty terrorists and their newly appointed government lawyers, I'd still have plenty of guilt dumped on my carnivorous head when it comes to the environment.

Before I proceed, is their anything we do that does not cause global warming?

I can't even get a beer gut without chipping off a chunk of the polar ice cap because researchers at the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine say fat people are killing the rain forests. Other researchers say eating meat is detrimental to the ozone layer, because of bovine flatulence and gas from manure. I say feed the cows some Beano. It works for my dogs, and I could eat my rib eye in peace.

Don't we get enough guilt from our daily existence? That's why God invented scales and parents. Do we really need politicians inventing new ways to make us feel bad?