I have had it with three things that are constant in my life. All have to do with training by store managers who must be men who never shop. The third has to do with women whose mothers never taught them manners.

The first aggravation is how clerks give back change. Imagine this. I have paid for my groceries. My purse is hanging on one arm, which paralyzes one hand. The clerk proceeds to place the receipt in my other hand, the dollars on top of the receipt, and the change on top of the dollars. Now both hands are occupied. A customer is waiting in line after me. I have no time to put my purse down and put the money in the proper place. There is only one thing left to do. Dump all of it in my purse. It used to be that the clerk put the receipt in one of the bags, handed me the dollars, gave me a chance to put them away, then gave me the change. This new way is in every store. What fool started this trend?

The second aggravation is how my grocery bags are filled. I beg the bag person. "Please don't put all seven cans of dog food in one bag. Please don't put all of the milk cartons in one bag. I am a weak 64- year- old woman. I cannot lift those bags up three flights of stairs to my kitchen." But they are all deaf to my pleas because obviously their boss has told them to do it another way.

Last week, all of my dog food was in one bag. Two cartons of milk and one carton of orange juice were in another bag. A large bottle of Lysol, a bottle of tide, and a bottle of Clorox were in a bag. When I opened the trunk of the car, the bottle of Lysol fell out into the driveway and busted. Lysol spewed everywhere. At least it didn't get on the bread that was in one bag by itself. Why?

I must admit, however, there is one grocery store whose managers watch over their people and actually try to please the customers. They even offer to take your bags to the car. I have started taking my business there even though folks say it is a bit more costly. I figure it will save me in the long run because I won't have to have back surgery.

The third aggravation concerns the discussion of breaks by store clerks and managers. I am waiting at the check out with a handful of purchases when the manager comes up to the clerk and discusses when she can have a break. All of a sudden I am invisible. The manager never looks my way. Does she not understand my money pays her salary? And then there is the clerk who constantly complains about her job and discusses the break with her cohort. And once again I, the customer, am invisible. Who is training these people?

Don't even get me started about clerks at convenient stores with phones stuck in their ears.