When I was 17, it seemed everyone I knew played in a band. As the years passed the numbers dwindled. Some continued to play into their college years, and a few toured into their twenties. More were killed by drugs than in Viet Nam.

Four guys from my circle of friends made a living in music. Three of those were under the radar; playing in bar bands, participating in recording sessions, or working as a musician for hire.

Only one guy made it to the big time. Chuck Leavell was in one of the local high school bands and now plays with The Rolling Stones. He has also tickled the keyboards for The Allman Brothers and Eric Clapton, but he is the exception.

The vast majority moved on with thier lives. They married, finished college, went to work, and gave up standing in front of people and performing. But never really got it out of their system.

I have three guitars in the Man Room and a door that closes. Whenever I want to, I can play and sing to my heart's content; or until The Woman Who's Garbage I'm Responsible For starts throwing shoes against the door.

A few weeks back, I visited Alabama to recharge my batteries and see my momma. I went a day early because some of my friends have started Thursday night jam sessions. They can't get it out of their system.

This wasn't a collection of losers trying to relive the past. My two close friends in the group own their own businesses. Randy designs websites. Richard does the heavy lifting for his wife's decorating firm.

The other guys include a vet, a dentist, and a bank president. The equipment was set up in a corner of the break room in a new bank building. Beer and the Blues on a Thursday evening in a corporate setting. Perfect.

They allowed me to sing a couple. I remembered most of the words and stayed within armslength of the correct key. It was great fun. Standing in front of a crowd with a few good people and performing is still high on the pleasure meter.

Men get a bum rap as they age. When the kids start to grow up and the money is less tight, lots of us start buying toys again.

Red sports cars, killer stereo systems, and musical instruments. For years we have been accused of trying to relive the past, reaching in vain for fast dying youth. Having a mid- life crisis.

For many of us, this isn't true. Most of the things we decide to do at 40 are things we never quit thinking about.

Raising a family is serious work. It requires money and attention to detail. When the family is on solid ground and the children are in college, a lot of guys go back to the things they never lost interest in. There is no mid- life crisis.

Those who leave their wife for a blonde named Bambi with the IQ of a guitar strap, that's a different story.