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Mike Maddock, General Manager
2007-07-06 / On Second Thought

Superglued to a bicycle seat

According to reports from Reuters News Agency, Conrad leaves his office to meet a client for a 10 o'clock appointment. While he's unlocking his parked car, two men approach him. "Easy does it, Conrad," says one of the abductors while pressing a pistol against his ribs. The two men force Conrad into the back seat of his Audi.

The kidnappers drive Conrad to his home in a fashionable part of town. Once inside Conrad's house, the victim is ordered to remove all of his clothing. "Strip down to the skin," he's told.

Conrad is ordered to sit on his exercise bike in the den while the kidnappers ransack his home. Conrad later reports the two men took their time and appeared to know exactly what they came there for. They took several thousand dollars in cash plus a priceless collection of old coins including extremely valuable coins from ancient Rome.

The intruders leave the house with Conrad still seated on his exercise bike. Why does he just sit there? Why doesn't he call the cops?

Perhaps because the kidnappers superglued him to the seat of his exercise bike. They also superglued his hands to the handlebars and sealed his mouth shut with a thin ribbon of superglue.

It wasn't until four hours later when Conrad's wife comes home- sees Conrad's dilemma- and calls the cops. Even after help arrives, understand that with superglued skin, release is no simple matter. Paramedics and cops work for several hours attempting to free poor Conrad.

But while rescuers are trying to figure out how to release this poor guy, he's sitting there, in front of everybody, naked as a jaybird. Kind of embarrassing. Details in news reports are skimpy, but Conrad is eventually released by using chemical agents, probably nail polish remover.

CallTheCops@sc.rr.com

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