Mike Cox Early in the evening, on Christmas Eve, 1995, I showed my grandson the moon through the telescope I got him. Later in the evening, after the rest of the family had retired, I sat on the floor with him between my knees. Zack was five years old and teaching me how to use his new computer program.

I’ve come a long way since that night. I can maneuver through many of the diagnostic keys of my computer, clean the hard drive, control spam, and isolate trouble to specific pieces of equipment.

While not a computer expert by any means, I am capable of handling much of what this digital world throws at me. At least I thought I did until I tried to hook up my new high definition television.

HDTV is the latest and greatest television technology. The pictures are incredible, the TVs themselves are really cool, and there are limitless possibilities available to anyone with a few dollars to spend. Okay, more than a few dollars is necessary.

As with most new things in the last decade, High Definition is part of the digital revolution. This means the picture, sound, and possibilities are more than anyone my age ever imagined. This also means you need someone five years old to understand the manuals and hookup schemes.

When I was a kid, my dad had one television with a roof antenna. He knew just where to point that antenna to get the best picture for each of the three channels available to us. Dad also knew where to slide the aluminum foil on the wire to fine tune the picture.

Now you need a receiver, a DVD player, a television or monitor, a surround sound system, and a digital HD cable box. You also need about a million dollars worth of expensive cables to connect all those wonderful components.

There are Monster cables, S video, A/V cables, and something called HDMI, which provide the Holy Grail of picture and sound. Each of these sets of connectors cost more than my dad’s old Motorola did brand new.

But the cost isn’t what bothers me or others like me. We hate the fact that undernourished, whippersnapper geeks with an attitude are the experts today. No one knows if they are telling the truth or jerking us around; paying us back for what we did to their parents in high school. The only sure way to maneuver through the minefield of technological electronics is to get a relative under ten to come by and hook everything up or at least translate the manual. Even that can cause some problems.

A couple of years ago, my brother got a new cell phone for Christmas. He called Madison, his nine– year–old granddaughter, to help him activate the voice dialing feature. Madison gave Rick a brief pause and one of those long sighs girls learn at birth.

“If you don’t know how to do it, I can figure it out myself,” my brother said. The little darling paused, then replied, “It’s not that I don’t know how to do it, I’m just not sure I can talk you through the process over the phone.”