I was around ten, and we were visiting my mother’s family in Texas. One evening my uncle Kay cooked steaks on the grill. It was the first steak I remember and tasted about as good as anything I had ever eaten.

When my uncle asked how I liked it, I said “fine.” I was shy and didn’t like being singled out by adults for conversation. Uncle Kay wasn’t satisfied with my answer. He suggested it was the best beef I ever tasted.

Not wanting to appear steak deprived and feeling some allegiance to my home state, I told him his mesquite grilled steak from Texas beef wasn’t much different from those in Alabama. Without smiling, he told me there was a tree in the back yard and some rope for people who didn’t appreciate good meat.

I wasn’t sure what to say. I thought he was joking but wasn’t quite ready to be hanged by the neck until dead over dinner. My dad asked him a question about something different and distracted him. Nothing else was said about my execution.

Many Americans feel strongly about beef. From hamburger helper to chili to chicken fried steak, most of us are happy to have meat on the table, happier still if that meat is from a cow.

Knowing you were eating beef used to be sufficient, but now marketing folks have their slimy talons into meat advertising, and just having beef isn’t enough anymore.

Hardee’s started an advertising campaign recently claiming only Angus beef was being used to make their hamburgers. Suddenly people were once again buying Hardee’s burgers and other restaurants began taking notice. Now no hamburger joint worth its mustard admits to using anything other than Angus.

According to the website for Angus brand beef, there is a qualification process for beef to get an Angus stamp of approval. Only eight percent of the applicants make the cut. The main distinction is something called marbling. Anyone who’s ever picked up a T–bone at Publix knows marbling is fat.

Fat is the ingredient that gives most foods a little extra flavor. Try some biscuits or cornbread with some fat free oil, then try the same with lard. There is no comparison. But no one claims they are using hamburger meat with more fat. Angus sounds a lot better.

And recently Taco Bell, that completely authentic Mexican restaurant chain, has started advertising Carne Asada beef. Taken literally, the words mean roasted meat. In Mexico, Carne Asada is a recipe for marinating and cooking meat. It isn’t a special type or style, it’s flavoring. But Taco Bell wants us to think they are using something exotic.

I know we live in a society where marketing rules. I also understand the average national intelligence level is falling as fast as the President’s approval rating. But are we at a point where people in marketing are making stuff up just to try to sell the same old thing? Never mind, I already know the answer.