Mike Cox Shorty Price was a minor politician and major Alabama football fan from the 50s until 1980. He had a little money and loved two things; the Crimson Tide and running for office.

Shorty was famous for his ineffectiveness as a candidate. He would re–use campaign posters from year to year; striking through Governor and printing Senator for the next contest.

He rarely missed an Alabama game. On homecoming weekend you could find him at the pep rally and bonfire on Friday night, drunk as a bicycle. During the parade the next morning, he would stagger along the curb, obviously still in the same clothes, and no closer to sober than the previous evening.

During the game, Shorty would make an appearance, usually in front of the student section. He would rouse the faithful with cheers and obscene gestures to the other team. He would have a stuffed replica of the opponents namesake and do vile things to it.

Shorty Price was the closest Alabama had to a mascot for many years. He was offensive to all Alabama fans, but especially those who were short, white, bald, and drunk. To anyone who supported Alabama football, he was an embarrassment, yet no one tried to do anything about him. He was just a part of the spectacle and no one thought too much about it after the game ended.

Shorty was killed in a car crash after a road loss to Mississippi State on November 8, 1980. His long career as the Tide’s unofficial mascot was over.

A stuffed elephant named Big Al came along around the time Shorty died. To me, the dancing stuffed elephant was as offensive as Shorty Price. But every other school had a cute mascot, so it was okay. Besides, kids love the furry devils, and the school makes millions in mascot marketing.

Last week, the NCAA decided mascots depicting Native Americans are offensive and no longer will be allowed during post season tournaments. Considering how thin–skinned folks have become, I’m not surprised.

Everyone is outraged by something. Last week in California, medical center employees complained about a Hooters billboard. I’m more offended by medical costs bordering on robbery than innuendos, but that’s just me.

The NCAA decision raises several questions. Why didn’t the governing body declare all Native American references illegal and be done with it? What makes the post season different? Does this mean football will finally get a post season? The fact we decide college football championships by sportswriters’ vote is offensive itself.

What about the mascots who don’t have enough political clout or white guilt to be taken seriously? The Fighting Irish, Jayhawks, and Cornhuskers all come to mind. I think all of those were meant to be derogatory and are now embraced. Some of the Native american nicknames were intended to be complimentary, and now some, but not all Native Americans are offended. Which group should the NCAA listen to?

Maybe we should rename all teams after animals. Nah, PETA would get involved; that’s worse than the NCAA.