A Series of Unfortunate Events
may not be for elementary school students
By John Dixon
Elementary School Critic

There is one cardinal movie rule at my house for those of us under the age of 18. Despite some occasional complaints on my part, I do think it is generally a good rule. The simple rule is this: You must read the book before you are allowed to see the movie.

On Friday, December 17, I attended the 4:45 showing of Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events at Columbia, North East’s Movies at Polo. I was looking quite forward to this movie because I have read every one of the Lemony Snicket books and loved them all. I tend to be a by–the–book kind of guy. I follow rules, read serials in order, and I like my movies to have more than a fleeting resemblance to the books I have read and enjoyed.

I knew going in that some details from the books would be lost because the trailers had made it clear this movie encompassed the first three books, Bad Beginnings , The Reptile Room , and The Wide Window . It was obvious that one three–hour movie could not hope to include all of the intricate plot twists from three such jam–packed volumes.

The casting and acting were generally superb. Emily Browning and Liam Aiken were believable as Violet and Klaus Baudelaire, and Jim Carrey was brilliant as the many faces of the nefarious Count Olaf. Meryl Streep was quite entertaining as the multi–phobic Aunt Josephine, and I even think I caught sight of Dustin Hoffman in the audience of the ill–fated wedding scene.

I was distracted and annoyed by the fact that Klaus was not bespectacled as he is in the books and I spent some time wondering how they plan to handle that serious omission in the sure–to– come sequel because the fact that Klaus wears glasses is central to the plot in book four, The Miserable Mill .

Once I recovered from that glaring omission I was offended by the choice of vocabulary appearing in the subtitles for Sunny’s comments. I personally do not find referring to someone as “Schmuck;” a young child saying, “Bite me” to an adult; and “I can bite a bit higher” referring to an attack on the Count’s family jewels to be appropriate for a movie sure to attract large numbers of elementary–aged children.

I had just told myself I was nit picking and had settled in to try to enjoy the rest of the movie when the whole thing turned to fruit salad. There was repeated reference to a golden spy glass throughout, which I do not remember from the books.

I would guess as a foreshadowing of the VFD connection, the rescue of Sunny from the tower and the fake but real wedding were all wrong and departed greatly from the books. They actually occurred at the end of book one and did not happen until the end of the movie after all of the events from books two and three.

All this said, did I enjoy this movie? Yes, I found it entertaining and well acted but I was so bothered by the liberal usage of creative license that I would rate it only two and a half stars. I also find myself wondering if I am really the target audience for this movie after all.

I suspect the objectionable language was added to spice things up and appeal to the middle school segment of the audience. Somehow, I doubt that Nickelodeon was aiming for the reading audience or it would have adhered a bit closer to the books. Had I not read and enjoyed all of the books so much, I might have enjoyed this movie more.